Keeping the spark alive in a relationship is hard; being together all the time causes that level of mystery, that certain something that used to be there in the beginning of the relationship, to give way for comfort and stability.

But how many people would love to have that spark back? That feeling of butterflies, the same emotions that made your heart beat palpably, your palms sweat and gave you the shivers?

No person is alike—we all like and dislike different things. Some people love hummus, some hate it, some love soccer, some can’t keep their eyes open longer than 10 minutes.

However, there are a few traits that most singles are looking for in a potential partner. There are just some things that nearly everybody wants and desires. Once you know what they want and how to portray this, then you will be one step ahead of the pack:

The scenario is always the same–your aunt eagerly tells you she has a beautiful, eligible woman who would love to meet you and who comes from a wonderful family—she’s educated, charming and is adept at all household chores. So, you decide to meet; you think, “hey, I’ve got nothing to lose, right?” Well, she doesn’t exactly turn out to be how your aunt describes—she’s at least 10 years older, and doesn’t seem to be very interested in what you have to say. The first meeting goes disastrously, (at least it will make a good story for your buddies,) and you swear off anymore arranged dates.

I’m finding someone myself, you decide. I know what I like, and I’m perfectly capable of doing it on my own. That’s when you suddenly realize just how hard it can be to find someone that you connect with.

Jaleel seemed like a great guy. He was charming, funny and very ambitious. Everything was going great until the day I heard him talking to his mother on the phone.

He was being so rude and short with her, that I couldn’t believe he was actually talking to his mother. I was a little startled, but I wasn’t sure exactly how to perceive this glimpse into another side of him.

You’ve finally found that special someone—they seem pleasant, caring and you have a lot to talk about.  The conversation flows easily, they make you laugh, and as a plus, your friends love them. One little problem: they aren’t Muslim.  Or Christian, or Jewish, or whatever faith it is that you now practice or grew up with.  Maybe they’re Shiite as opposed to Sunni Muslim, or Catholic as opposed to Protestant.

The dilemma here is:  I don’t share the same faith with this person, but I really connect with them.  What to do?  Do you continue a possible relationship?  What would be the issues that arise from such a decision?  The following are things that both people should think about when contemplating going forward in a relationship:

We were lucky enough to interview Dalel Khalil, the author of From Veils to Thongs: An Arab Chick’s Survival Guide to Balancing One’s Ethnic Identity in America; her recent book that has everyone laughing and nodding their heads about the challenges and humor of culturally navigating between East and West.  The subtitle of the book says it all.

Here’s what she has to say about a whole range of interesting topics.  If you haven’t had the chance to read the book, we suggest you read it, read it now.  You will not regret it!  Read more>>

Question: Dear Dr. Bousa!!
Is getting intimate with the person you love wrong??
I guess this is very sensitive question that Im trying to find out the answer for…..As you know, when you met someone on Arab Lounge most of them are long distance, and it’s very rare to find someone in your own town and click together [...]

Question: Dear Dr. Bousa,
I was forced to marry a man when I was 20 years old. Our marriage was brief and I’ve been divorced for 15 years. Over the years, many men have come forward from my community. However, I’m never really attracted to these men and find them incompatible. Also, these men seemed unstable [...]